Understanding Shame

Shame is a powerful emotion. It can stop us in our tracks preventing us from leading a fulfilling life. Did you know that shame is actually a survival response? In order to be accepted in the group, shame gives us a sense of protection from actions that we perceive as outside cultural norms and laws that enable us to exist in our community.

Humans are social beings and our brains are wired to connect with a community. From an evolutionary standpoint, shame guides us to follow the social norms of the group. It can also hold us back from meeting our potential and erode self-worth, leaving us questioning our abilities.

Shame is an internalization of experiences that convince us we possess flaws and often a response to the need for social acceptance. When unaware of its impact, shame becomes a self-limiting force and can cause us to question our value.

Shame isn’t who you are though it can impede our personal growth. The inner voice asking, "Am I good enough?" undermines confidence and drives an unhealthy focus on others' opinions and puts too much emphasis on what other think of you. Rejecting yourself before others can reject you.

If any of this sounds familiar, there are ways to heal this shame and create the fulfilling life you deserve. One of the most powerful ways to combat shame is to identify it and bring it out into the light. By acknowledging and naming the shame you carry, you take away some of its power. Exploring feelings of shame can release its control over your decisions and actions. The journey begins with gaining perspective on when and how our shame is triggered. By understanding the roots of our shame, we can begin to dismantle its hold on us.

If you are curious to learn more, I invite you to reach out and connect with me. Together, we can explore shame and create a path forward. The first step begins with a simple decision to reach out.

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